i made this to explain an online "mixtape" and ended up going in depth with it.. lol…

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2 Dic 2010, 21:18

Megadeth - "A Tout Le Monde"
A Tout le Monde
lyrics--http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/A-Tout-Le-Monde-lyrics-Megadeth/BD963EC213AB09C5482568BF0023A61D
video--http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aU-dKoFZT0A

"Moving on is a simple thing
What it leaves behind is hard
You know the sleeping feel no more pain
And the living all are scarred
A tout le monde
A tout mes amis
Je vous aime
Je dois partir
So as you read this know my friends
I'd love to stay with you all
Please smile, smile when you think about me
My body's gone that's all"

this excerpt makes me think of Kyle. i guess i see it as something i think he might say to us now. [i slightly altered the words. They should be "...Je dois partir. These are the last words I'll ever speak And they'll set me free. So as you read this know my friends..."]

> A tout le monde (To all the world!)
> A tout mes amis (To all my friends)
> Je vous aime (I love you)
> Je dois partir (I must leave)

ﺴ۩๑๑۩۞۩๑๑۩ﺴ

The Offspring - "Gone Away"
Gone Away
lyrics--http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Gone-Away-lyrics-Offspring/4EE1946E2B10A5E24825689E000C06FE
video--http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=numCZoBFcv4

self explanatory..

ﺴ۩๑๑۩۞۩๑๑۩ﺴ

Audioslave - "Like A Stone"
Like a Stone
lyrics--http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Like-A-Stone-lyrics-Audioslave/E636A1F1D982606048256C6A000A33D3
video--http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7QU1nvuxaMA

i do believe in Heaven and hell, and if they do in fact exist, i happen to know that my Kyle is, in fact, in Heaven.
i miss him more than my little sister and even my own daughter.
i will mourn them until the day that i finally die, and i must see them again. Until then i'll continue to sleep in his room alone. Until then i'll wait in their homes, searching the rooms for a ghost.
[if anyone's actually reading this, my daughter is still alive, but she was adopted. She just turned 3 and still hardly knows who i am, much less what i am. i very rarely have the opportunity to go see her.]

ﺴ۩๑๑۩۞۩๑๑۩ﺴ

Gary Jules - "Mad World"
Mad World
lyrics--http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Mad-World-lyrics-Gary-Jules/548D7C71234C97CE48256E1A0012BF2A
video--http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4N3N1MlvVc4

"And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take"

This excerpt from 'Mad World'... it just depends on your opinion of the song. If you look it up on songmeanings.net, [not the one that says something about donnie darko next to it] Canadian Bacon and i have shared our thoughts on it. His way of looking at it described how i've felt to today almost to a tee.
--
"And I find it kind of funny
I find it kind of sad"
i always feel so terrible now. All i ever want to talk about is what happened and how awful everything is and how wonderful everything was, etc etc, but i cant do this all the time. One, i can only depress people for so long before i start to feel bad about it; and two, i know Kyle would not want me to feel and be this way; i know i need to get over it already and be the best me i can be - so i often try to have a sense of humor about the things i say.
--
"The dreams in which I'm dying
Are the best I've ever had"
It's true, i dont want to be here anymore. [no i am not fucking suicidal, i'm just impatiently waiting for my day to come]
i do fairly often day dream of the day God finally takes me, and i can be with my beautiful loved ones again - and it feels good.
--
"I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take"
i dwell on shit too much and all too often i try to express myself and fucking fail. Miserably. It's hard to live with that.

ﺴ۩๑๑۩۞۩๑๑۩ﺴ

Primitive Radio Gods - "Standing Outside A Broken Phone Booth With Money In My Hand"
Standing Outside a Broken Phone Booth With Money in My Hand
lyrics--http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/standing-outside-a-broken-phone-booth-with-money-in-my-hand-lyrics-primitive-radio-gods/0982c64bdc72a45448256daf0004fc31
video--http://www.myspace.com/video/nicksmall/primitive-radio-gods/127677

"A life is time, they teach you growing up
The seconds ticking killed us all
A million years before the fall
You ride the waves and don't ask where they go
You swim like lions through the crest
And bathe yourself in zebra flesh
I've been downhearted, baby
I've been downhearted, baby
Ever since the day you left
Ever since the day you left"

The lyrics in this excerpt are again pretty self explanatory to me.
This song was a favorite by Kyle and i. His death was unexpected, and he was so, so happy when it happened[in life and just the moment]. It took him almost 25 years to finally gain happiness, he had had a lot of experience and many trials in his life. He used to write letters to God. He really was a genius man, the smartest person i and many others have ever met, but he felt he expressed himself best by pencil and paper. We found some of these letters, all dated. The earlier ones were so sad, begging God for help and asking if He'd forgotten him; the newest that we found was completely different, he was finally happy, and so thankful to God.
The lyrics actually say "Ever since the day we met," but the change was necessary. i was most certainly not 'down hearted' "ever since the day we met". No, it was the best year of my life. Everything had changed for the best, everything was perfect.

ﺴ۩๑๑۩۞۩๑๑۩ﺴ

Goo Goo Dolls - "Iris"
Iris
lyrics--http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/Iris-lyrics-Goo-Goo-Dolls/A23317573866E942482568E30001234E
video--http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NdYWuo9OFAw

"And I'd give up forever to touch you,
Cause I know that you feel me somehow.
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be,
And I don't want to go home right now.
And all I can taste is this moment,
And all I can breathe is your life,
And sooner or later it's over,
I just don't want to miss you tonight.
And I don't want the world to see me,
Cause I don't think that they'd understand.
When everything's made to be broken,
I just want you to know who I am.
And you cant fight the tears that ain't coming,
Or the moment of the truth in your lies.
When everything feels like the movies,
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive."

pretty self explanatory but i'll elaborate anyways.

People have been asking me what i want to do with my life now. Thing about that is, my future died and there's no bringing it back; not the one that i want. i want to do nothing because nothing will bring him back. [i didnt even mean to make that a pun, too bad life doesnt work that way anyway] All i ever want to do is dream about the day i'll be with him again ["I'd give up forever to touch you,"] and stare at the moon ["Cause I know that you feel me somehow."]
--
I am a christian but i am too logical to be a very good one, so i often feared that he's "the closest to heaven that I'll ever be."
--
Now all i can do to be with him is go to the cemetery and his empty home; ["And I don't want to go home right now."]
--
"And all I can taste is this moment,
And all I can breathe is your life,
And sooner or later it's over,
I just don't want to miss you tonight."
The night he died was one of the best nights in my whole life. It was beautiful. Had a beer while standing only close enough to the water for it to roll over just our feet, then held each other for a few minutes in the same spot; smoked a bowl, laying side by side on the beach sharing the iPod headphones, listening to Blind Guardian. About ten minutes before it happened he looked over at me and said "i love this so much," then he looked up at the stars; he had a beautiful smile.
--
"And I don't want the world to see me,
Cause I don't think that they'd understand.
When everything's made to be broken,
I just want you to know who I am."
i so badly wish i'd known when he went into the water, that he wouldn't come back out until 8 hours later.
--
"And you cant fight the tears that ain't coming,
Or the moment of the truth in your lies."
This true and all but it doesnt really apply to what i've quoted this song for..
--
"When everything feels like the movies,
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive."
irony; concerts; drugs; writing; visiting the cemetery; even not buckling my seatbelt much anymore.
etcetera.

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