So, these magic 8-ball things are supposed to be uncannily accurate...

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22 Sep 2006, 1:39

How does the world see me?
Song: Cold as Ice
Artist: Foreigner
Comments: F&^#ing bastards...

Will I have a happy life?
Song: Creature Of The Wheel
Artist: White Zombie
Comments: Apparently I'm destined to be a slave to the corporate machine...not an entirely unpleasant prospect as it guarantees job security...

What do my friends really think of me?
Song: Lunatic of God's Creation
Artist: Deicide
Comments: That's about right.

Do people secretly lust after me?
Song: Sleeping Bag
Artist: ZZ Top
Comments: Hmm, that's a yes if I ever saw one.

How can I make myself happy?
Song: Barracuda
Artist: Heart
Comments: Go fishing?!?! I hate fishing. This damn 8-Ball is broke.

What should I do with my life?
Song: Master of Puppets
Artist: Metallica
Comments: President of the Universe. Hell, I was planning on doing that already...stupid 8-Ball.

Why should life be full of so much pain?
Song: Battery
Artist: Metallica
Comments: Thank you Captain Obvious. We know life is full of pain, but WHY? Stupid 8-ball.

How can I maximize my pleasure during sex?
Song: Control It
Artist: Static-X
Comments: Works for me.

Will I ever have children?
Song: Of Unknown Origin
Artist: Professional Murder Music
Comments: Dammit. Guess I should stop sleeping with every slutty bitch at all those parties...

Will I die happy?
Song: Bringer Of Blood
Artist: Six Feet Under
Comments: When I go, I'm taking everyone with me!

What is some good advice for me?
Song: Demanufacture
Artist: Fear Factory
Comments: Tear shit up? I'm there.

What is happiness?
Song: The Chastising Of Renegade
Artist: Primus
Comments: So, where can I find Renegade?

What is my favourite fetish?
Song: Nobody's Real
Artist: Powerman 5000
Comments: What in Hell is that supposed to mean? Pretend I'm screwing no one?

How will I be remembered?
Song: Tommy The Cat
Artist: Primus
Comments: In what manner do I resemble a character named Tommy the Cat?!? This 8-Ball is definitely broken.

How do I get more sex?
Song: Frequency
Artist: Tantric
Comments: That's the desired result you stupid 8-Ball! Shit, HOW?!?

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  • g776655

    [quote]Will I have a happy life? Song: Creature Of The Wheel Artist: White Zombie Apparently I'm destined to be a slave to the corporate machine...not an entirely unpleasant prospect as it guarantees job security...[/quote] Apparently you haven't been keeping up with changes in the corporate machine? Job security is no longer any part of the deal. ;-)

    22 Sep 2006, 2:24
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