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  • :)

    30 Dic 2009, 3:58

    This is pretty much only for me. I think I've got everyone exhausted on the many other user-account sites that I'm a member of... I doubt they'll look in here.... hello haven!

    Its almost the end of 2009 and wow has it been amazing. probably the best year of my life. It was exactly what I needed to get my mind straightened out. A year wiser.... a year more experienced.

    I'd like to give a small shout-out to my new baby kitten, Blaze, named after the marking on his nose.



    Michael and I named this kitten together.

    I picked a major in school. One that I didn't pick because I needed something or because someone else had a genius plan for me; this one I picked for myself. Psychology. If it weren't psychology it would probably be nutrition because I've already studied it so much that I'd be foolish to let that interest go to waste. I'm attending Santa Monica college which is the best community college in southern california, even better than Long Beach which I absolutely loved.

    I've got full support from everyone in my family as well as a handful of close friends. I'm very lucky to have such an opportunity. It reminds me of what I'd like to give later on in life. Of course I'd like to give what I didn't have when I was young, but I do want to make sure and give what I was lucky enough to have... I must never forget that.

    Goodbye 2009.

    Hello 2010. May this year be better than the last, may I be surrounded with love and laughter and may all my friends be as lucky as I.

    Yours truly,
    Jennifer Denisse Esteban
  • Music MANIPULATION

    3 Abr 2009, 23:04

    So I realized around age 15 that music paves the path of my mood. At first I did it without knowing and I didn't know how to make it work for me, how to get myself out of my negative moods and turn them into something more productive. I've gone through battles with music: "I don't want to listen to that, it makes me sad"...or angry, or anxious. Sometimes I would get into habits with music - no matter what my mood was, I'd listen to the same thing over and over and over and over... and it wouldn't do anything for me. I've burned out a few bands that way. I was stuck in this NIN hole for at least a couple years.

    Anyways....

    I learned that combinations work best. If I'm in X mood then I need Y music to change it into something productive. Or if I'm in Z mood I need some Q music to balance it out into something different but still emotionally more stable than I started out as... almost like finding a good level of any emotion. It pretty much puts me in an extreme of a good hue of any color or...mood.

    I've also noticed that I feel circles in the music I like. Some are more pointy and others are rashy, but I feel circles.

    Circles have always been a big thing for me. Interpret that as you may.

    One of my favorites is HANDS DOWN... Die Form. I fucking love them so much. And I can't even compare them to another band, there isn't one like them.

    Ugh... I less than 3 music

    (I <3 music)
  • Theres something very strange

    28 Nov 2008, 12:01

    about this moment... the people in my life... it all seems so very surreal... and

    where will they be in my life a few years from this moment? 4:00am today