Lunes 14 Abr 2008, 18:06

I'm just doing this because I got bitched at by someone (who isn't a friend or in my neigbors list) for not paying enough attention to them. WTF!!!

This is more of a warning to the people that I may be talking to on here or those who notice that I'm around and listening to music but think I'm ignoring them when they send messages. That really isn't the case.

I don't sleep much, maybe two or three hours of solid sleep a day if I'm lucky. It's not the falling asleep that is difficult (I can close my eyes and will myself to sleep in minutes), it's the staying alseep that I have problems with. Most of the time I'll doze off for 10 or 15 minutes only. And it's weird because I can sleep through anything. Airplanes taking off, tornado sirens, earthquakes, people yelling, gunshots, etc. But if someone whispers my name or touches me I'm instantly awake. There is no moment of grogginess either that most people have when adjusting from being asleep and then waking up. It seems that I'm either on or off and some practical joker is always flipping the damn switch.

This is something I've been dealing with for almost seven years now and nothing seems to help. Sometimes, getting shit-faced drunk helps; but not really, it just makes the world spin even faster. I don't think It affects my waking life too much unless I've been up for days at a time in which case my thoughts get muddled and incoherent I get edgy and canterkerous even and have a constant headache. Hell I've even had hallucinations after being awake for 80+ hours. I definitely tend to ramble on in my conversations with other people.

A lot of the times when I'm laying awake late at night I'll set up a playlist of anywhere from 4 to 12 hours of music on it, set it on random and see if I can get any sleep. Sometimes I get a little, sometimes none at all. Believe it or not I find heavy extreme music to be soothing. If I try to listen to something light and airy it tends to annoy me more than anything and keeps me awake. But for some reason on the nights that I do leave some music playing I do sleep better.

So if you see me on here and I seem to be listening to stuff at random, I may actually be asleep or just dozing. And if you leave a message I'll get back to you within moments or a few hours depending. Just don't think I'm ignoring you and then berate me for it.